Humanist Workers for Revolutionary Socialism

Alienation in the Post Cold War Era
Chapter 15
Objectivity as a
Requirement for Love

The Objective Person Versus the Subjective Person

Objectivity is one of the most critical requirement for love. Yet, for the last decades the ability to be objective has been looked upon with disdain. We are rapidly abandoning all the gains of rational thinking from the early part of the 20th century. We have retreated to the great romanticism of the 19th century. What dominates the circles of middle class — which is supposedly the main (class) carrier of culture — is fear of the mind and objectivity. The middle class has fled to the romanticism of irrational emotions through mysticism. This is clearly expressed by the so called new age movement and the spiritual movement which are spreading like mushrooms not only within the middle class but sectors of the working class as well.¹ This is also, of course, reflected in the growth of mainstream and fundamental religions, which are successfully forcing schools in parts of the U.S. to reject Darwin laws of evolution, or at least present them side by side with the “creationist” views —­ as if such distorted subjective views that reflect the infancy of humanity are as valid as objective science.

The mountainous rise of subjectivism and the rejection of reasoning, is encroaching, indeed, many progressive sectors of society. Even progressive therapists routinely equate objective reasoning — that is, the ability to see other persons as they really are without the distortion of subjective filters — with being judgmental. This surge of idealist subjectivism reflects the deepening of the reactionary social period. It reflects the lost hope for social change and genuine personal growth, and in the last analysis, the growing cynicism toward the capacity to love.

The subjective person sees everything through distortion’s filters that express his/her neediness, fears and insecurities; such a person constantly mixes his/her needs, goals, and fears with reality as it is; he/she always confuses the ideological distortion and conditioning of society with what is. The narcissistic orientation is just the sharpest portrayal of the typical subjective person in our society. The narcissistic person experiences as real only that which exists inside, while the outside world have no reality in and by itself, separated from the experience inside. The narcissistic person experiences things only from the viewpoint of their being useful or dangerous.

The opposite of narcissism is objectivity. The objective person is capable to see people and things as they are, objectively; he/she can separate people and the external world from one’s own fears and desires. A person who is capable of being objective — unfortunately a small minority in our society — is capable most of the time to sort out the subjective needs and fears from reality, thus getting closer to reality as it is.

The capacity to love is profoundly associated with the ability to be objective, to use reasoning. Without the ability to use reasoning, my subjective worries and anxieties prevent me from seeing and experiencing the real person. But when I am objective I do not need the distorted subjective filters that inhibit my capacity to experience love and reach the deeper more human part of the other. When I am able to see myself and other persons as we are without my needy projections, and when I can overcome the illusions and incestuous/narcissistic distortions of myself and others, I begin to see the real reality of the other person. At this point I can see the person’s real dynamic, and I need less emotional defense mechanisms in my relationship with the other person. When I see myself and the other as we are without fears, I can relate to him/her from my truer deeper essence, and penetrate his/her deeper essence with the act of loving.

To love I must strive to objectivity in every situation. I need to develop the ability to see the person’s behavior from the deeper objective perspective — free of my interests, needs and insecurities. At the point when I am no longer driven by insecurities, I am no longer possessed by an irrational emotional psyche that feels attacked by the person’s “dark” social character; thus I gain the ability to see the person’s contradictions as they are objectively — from a deep humanistic angle of compassion and love that is not tainted by my social anxieties. Only then can I truly love my friend, that is, reach out to him/her, from my deeper human essence. I can gently reach out to the better part of the person — to his/her real joy and sadness.

It is true that even under the best social circumstances, nobody can be completely objective. But I would distinguish between the natural healthy human strive to be objective and complete, and the severe distortion of this facility by the present society. At the present society we relate to ourselves and others from our fears, and from our irrational adherence to our herd: to our family, our social clique, our race, our nation. We view the rest from the distorted prism and prison of our social group. Our fears are manipulated and enlarged by our narcissistic mind which views people, nature and the world from the fragility of the threatened ego. Thus our views of others and the world become a rationalization for our hidden fears and desires. In sum: objectivity is the rare exception in a social/economic system in which the human psyche is based on alienated relations to the self and others — where fears, mistrust, and insecurities dominate human relations.

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